I
am Aleksandar Aleksandrov. I am 26 years old and I work in "Ogilvy
& Mather" as a graphic designer. The first drug that I
took was marijuana. I had been offered this many times but I would
always refuse having a feeling it was not for me. But, in one period
the relationship with my girlfriend was in crisis, and I started
falling into depression, with a feeling that there is no way out,
with feelings of failure. That is why I took marijuana with which,
the worries, for a moment, would disappear and I could relax for
a while. I began smoking it regularly every day and I was convinced
I was not addicted to it. I knew why it was I taking it because
with it I could stop the negative feelings and I could run away
from the problems I had. The problems from which I was running away
from though, were growing bigger and bigger every day - because
I was not solving them and I also started feeling as if I had no
feelings in me. I was diving deeper and deeper. I started taking
ecstasy and LSD. On LSD I had beautiful experiences of a higher
states of consciousness. In life I was experiencing magical colours,
great joy, things were becoming crystal clear.
So I came to a point whilst being on LSD where I had to ask myself
a question that needed answering: should I continue taking drugs
or should I find another way of reaching those wonderful states
of mind without drugs? The following day I stopped taking all kinds
of drugs, cigarettes, and alcohol simultaneously and I started searching
for the Path that can take me to this higher consciousness. Then
I met Kristijan who at that time was leading the Komaja community
in Skopje. He was a living proof for me that that which was written
in the Komaja book can be a way of life. I have chosen the Path
of Komaja. The Path of Love. The turning point for quitting the
drugs was the change of the surrounding and the support of a healthy
community based on love. I have peers who also wanted to stop taking
drugs, but they have always failed because they had no support and
the old surrounding was pulling them in the old ways of living.
Before I thought that I needed drugs to be happy. Now I know that
the whole time I had a need for love and that with the drugs I was
running away from the problems through which I could learn how to
live in love.
Today I am thankful to the Community and to my spiritual teacher
Makaja for opening up for me a completely different life. Life is
wonderful!
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